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gumption.\r\nDespite all the media reports that your Facebook profile is giving the wrong [Read More]


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Robb Kloss

Kia ora Joe,
As I search my memory from over 20 years ago I must write that your assessment certainly bears resemblance to the person I knew back then, and reconnected with down the track. And by the wide and varied topics and information on your blog I think I get you! At least in a way that has stimulated much thought, and growth in my own life. Kia ora Joe.\
Noho ora mai ra, e hoa,


Thanks, Robb - I think I get you, too :-). if you signup for YouJustGetMe, please let me know. So far, no one has accepted my invitation to guess me. I guess I'll add the Facebook app and see if that attracts any more attention (or action).


I read the conference paper and am not convinced. This research does not show that people make accurate judgements of users' personalities; it only demonstrates that users make accurate judgements of the personae users present online - which may or may not match their real personality. I.e. the self-assessment is idealised, and the online viewers simply describe the idealised identity presented online.

Note that this idealisation is not a cynical, conscious act. As Robbie Burns said, "O wad some Power the gift to gie us, to see oursel' as ithers see us".

James M

Hey, I'm pretty certain that including the info will bias all the data on your profile one way or another.

If I were you I would take it off and perhaps link to another post.


A very interesting read. Thanks.
You might be interested in It's not directly related to what you have discussed in your post, but I've found it to be a remarkably accurate gauge of my current mood and psychological mindframe.


Peter: you raise an interesting point. Although studies have shown that people's self-presentations on Facebook and online dating sites are pretty accurate, we don't know whether the self-presentations on YouJustGetMe are [as] accurate. Having recently read (and reviewed) Sam Gosling's related book, Snoop: What Your Stuff Says About You, I learned that Self-Verification Theory suggests that "people want to be seen as they really are (or at least as they see themselves)" - but that just brings us back to your question about idealized selves. I really don't have a good answer for the epistemo-psychological question "How is self-knowledge possible?" - as I noted in the post, I've often wrestled with the related issues of self-reflection and self-expression on this blog and elsewhere - and in the absence of a good answer, I'm willing to provisionally accept that you just get me if you you see me as I see my idealized self. But I'm open to further dialogue about this issue, because I really do want to better understand [my self].

James M: you're probably right; I've introduced bias into the pseudo-experiment by incorporating the results from YouJustGetMe into this post. To be honest, very few people (I think 3 or 4 so far) have participated in the experiment, and I suspect given the usual distribution of readers to contributors (99% to 1% or so) across the web, far more people will read the post than proceed to the YouJustGetme site. If I were to do it again, I would split the results into a separate post; for now, I'll edit the post to add a "warning" label before showing the results, in case others try to guess / get me.

piano_man: thanks for the kind words, and the link to the Color Quiz. Several of the results correspond to my perception of my idealized self (and even my currently stressed and depleted self, as I'm recovering from a bad cold I picked up in Europe last week), but a few are rather dissonant (I don't like to see myself as egocentric or victimized). However, in keeping with a desire I re-affirmed in a response to Dan Oestreich's comment on my recent post reviewing Sam Gosling's book - to remain open (to my blindspots) - and at the risk of further biasing the earlier invitation to experiment that James M commented on, I'll disclose the results below.

Your Existing Situation

Sensitive and understanding but under some strain; needs to unwind in the company of someone close to him.

Your Stress Sources

Feels unappreciated and finds the existing situation threatening. Wants personal recognition and the esteem of others to compensate for the lack of like-minded people with whom to ally himself and make himself more secure. His sensual self-restraint makes it difficult for him to give himself, but the resulting isolation leads to the urge to surrender and merge with another. This disturbs him as he regards such instincts as weaknesses to be overcome; only by not succumbing to them, he feels, can he withstand the difficulties of the situation. Wants to be valued as a desirable associate and admired for his personal qualities.

Your Restrained Characteristics

Insists that his hopes and ideas are realistic, but need reassurance and encouragement. Egocentric and therefore quick to take offense.

Your Desired Objective

Defiantly opposes any sort of restriction or opposition. Sticks obstinately to his own point of view in the belief that this proves his independence and self-determination.

Your Actual Problem

Depleted vitality has created an intolerance for any further stimulation, or demands on his resources. This feeling of powerlessness subjects him to agitation and acute distress. He reacts by considering that he has been victimized, and insists--with indignation, resentment, and defiance--on being given his own way.

Your Actual Problem #2

The need for esteem--for the chance to play some outstanding part and make a name for himself--has become imperative. He reacts by insisting on being the center of attention, and refuses to play an impersonal or minor role.

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